Sumtimes, It Takes me A Minute...

... To remember who my TRUE friends Are...


And it makes me sad

When it comes down to it I have my few..

Nicolas
Your amazingly compassionate, & understanding,
And waaay stronger than me.
I have no idea how you wake up & move on each day.
It hurts me to think your willing to stick by my through everything, 
even tho I know how much it tears you up inside.
I appreciate your selflessness.
&& love you eternally for it.

Breeze
Even when we drift apart...
Your still closer than ANYONE.
Knowing me better than myself sometimes,
You calm me down when I can't seem to find my breath,
You make me smile when I See nothing but black,
You make me feel like I MEAN Something,
...like I'm not alone.
I Can't EXIST without you there to hold my hand
when I feel I cant stand up anymore...
More than a friend, more than a sister, more than a soul mate
And its Stronger than Any love I Could Explain.

Gibby
No matter what we go through.
No matter how MAD I get at you
No matter how BITCHY I Get
No matter how much I push you to your limit..
You still stand by me.
You still are there to be one of my BEST friends.
You know the real me behind the fake smile.
the sad, self-conscious, damaged, && depressed.
..And even after all of that
(Even though I know I make it hard not to)  
you don't JUDGE me.
Your still willing to look everyone in the face & say  

"Yup, That's MY Friend"
I Appreciate, &&Love you more than I act.
I hope you know that.

Irish 
My twin, in ways I'll never understand.
Allowing me the luxury of being silly & stupid around you,
providing the structure and honesty of a brother when I need it the most.
You lend your ear when I just need someone to listen,
You speak your piece with "no sugar" when I feel I need to be told,
& then provide your shoulder when i need to let my walls crumble & fall...
Even if I only do for a moment.
Your understanding is amazing..
you patience with me is a complete skill.
Thank you for always being you.

Brewster

You ARE my sunshine 'lil one.
Plain & Simple.
my heart, my soul..
You are my escape.

These people need to know that they mean MORE to me than anything.
&& I hope That I don't ever push them far enough.. that they give up on me.

I'm Trying.
With EVERY ounce of strength That I have Left.

**But Sometimes I feel like I may not win this time.
I want to just give up.**

So please,
allow your patience to see through my facade and still love me 
for who you know I still AM under all this mess.

It's Still Me,
just a little lost.

So Sometimes, It takes me A Minute...